View From The Porch

It's a calm cool (68 degree) evening. Mommy and the Booglet are asleep. The night slips in with a new moon pass. This time next week we'll all be singing Van Morrison's tune, stolen from Alan Watts "Cloud Hidden, Whereabouts Unknown." Excuse me for just a little while--I have some fish to deal with. And a little girl.

Sweetheart, I write this for you, knowing that you may read it far in the future. So know this about our wild adventure--your Mother and I used to roam Cape San Blas with little on either. We used to both romp around naked, playing in the surf. Now we need to show you the grassflats, the oysters, the majesty of nature...

Sugary Bear, there are other forces at work--forces we don't understand or appreciate--but none of them will stand in the way of our time together. Time for me to look in your clear brown eyes and say, "let's go play."

That is the greatest gift of all: that time you give me. It's all I could have ever wanted. It's more than I deserve.

Cost of War in Iraq

This makes me sick. I think of the schools that could be built, the teachers that could be paid, the interest that could be spared.

And this is just the monetary cost of this war.

Wednesday Musings

* The more I think about it, I would rather fight the "terrorists" here than across the globe.

* Finally some rain here. My squash, cucumbers and sunflowers will make it yet.

* Driving to pick up mexican dinner Monday night, I went through a hollow. Everywhere were fire flies, like swampy Will-O-Wisps. Nature just knocks me out.

* Just two more weeks before our special adventure.

* Booglet back in school today for the first time in two weeks. We bumped thumped to school listening to Creedence Clearwater Revival...

Nature's Swim Lessons

My job sometimes wears on me. The things I'm asked to do for people--the trust given. It can be overwhelming at times--everyone in need of something. Lawyers have become the priests of the 21st century. People come to us to confess and to find relief. Sometimes it seems like too much.

And then there are days....like yesterday.

I get a call from a defense attorney for a railroad company. The railroad company is replacing a bridge over a local bayou. I'm on (yet another) board--an environmental group founded by R. Kennedy Jr. We don't like the fact that the company is proposing to leave the 40 year old creosote pilings in the mud. The company ignores our letters so...we...file...a...(wait for it)...lawsuit. Now I have the Short Line Railroad's attorney calling me. Apparently our request for subpoenas from DEP has stirred someone.

"We will remove the pilings." He says. I'm e-mailing our proposed agreement.

The Short Line is agreeing to remove all the pilings, even the ones from previous bridges possibly going back as far as the 1880s. This is a huge win.

And so I drive home feeling like I've affected the world in a positive way today. As I'm pulling in, I see the Booglet and her Mother heading toward the bay. The Booglet turns to me and waves--even through the car I hear her squeal, "Daddy!" It's the best sound in the world. It's why I like spitting at big companies trying to cut corners with the public's inheritance. She's picking (and eating) blackberries on her way to the bay. It's good to see her back to normal.

I promise to return in my new red swim suit Mommy got. Promises to little girls are never to be broken. Not by me sweetheart--not today.

We're down at the bay. The south wind is sending easy rollers in as we splash out "deep." We spin around in the water, the little one is laughing, I'm smiling, Mommy's watching (regretting she doesn't have the camera). Don't worry my sweet Calamity Jane--you and I saw her laughing as the last red rays filtered through the pines. We'll remember her laugh, her skinny legs kicking and splashing.

The Booglet gets braver and braver in the water, kneeling till her body is submerged up to her neck in the bay.

I look at her. It's the moment of truth.

"Let's go underwater," I say.

"You go first." She replies. So I do. It's still a little cool but the air is warm. I slip my head beneath the waves.

She's watching when I surface.

"Now you go."

"No you go again," she's smiling. So I do it again, pinching my nose closed and laying back, letting the cool bay wash over me. I surface. She's still watching.

And the rogue wave hits. I'm two feet from her, a former lifeguard, and I watch her lose her balance and slip under. I reach out and grab her, pulling her back up. She's scared and exhilarated. I choose the latter.

"You did it! You went under!" She's looking at me, her eyes wide with fear. But there's something else there too--something wonderful. She didn't want to do it--she wasn't going to go under. But nature, in its own unique way, threw her into the mix.

I look straight into her big brown eyes, "When you go under," I said, "close your eyes and hold your nose." I'm smiling at her wet face, wiping the droplets from her eyes. I'm very close to her, "I'm so proud of you."

Later, after dinner, I think it's good advice for myself, or for anyone who gets overwhelmed by the daily dunkings.

When you go under, close your eyes and hold your nose.

And you'll be fine. You can do it. I'm so proud of you.

Wednesday Musings

After all my preparations, my trial date was lost. I now have two days (count them) with nothing on my calendar. Nature abhors a vacuum, so I'm sure something will come up.

What came up, literally, last week was everything my little Booglet ate or drank. She was so sick we didn't get to wear our Easter dress, or look for eggs, or play. Like The Cat and the Hat, all we could do was sit sit sit sit, and we did not like it, not one little bit. It got so bad that eventually on Easter Sunday there we were, sitting in the hospital emergency room. I held her and she just sat there listlessly. And while holding my little one, surrounded by the din of hospital speakers and watching the walking wounded of the waiting room I thought about this saying, "God so loved the world that he gave his only son."

Easter Sunday, when the Christian world celebrates the resurrection, and I'm sitting here with this warm little girl in my lap, wrapping my arms around her, smelling her hair and trying to keep her engaged by commenting on the various little children sitting around us. And I think:

There's no way in the world I could give this child up.

When Isaac asks his innocent child question of Abraham, "where's the lamb for the offering?" and Abraham says God will provide, his faith has outstripped mine. My little one looks up at me and says "Daddy, I don't feel very good" or, after throwing up again says, "I'm sorry," and I realize there is no way in hell I could part with this child. I realize that I would move mountains to protect her, that I would hold her as long as she is sick, comfort her as long as I have breath, and God help anyone who got in my way. In just over two years, this little one has yanked my heart out and taken it over. I am a willing conspirator–she can have it as long as she stays around.

Christians view the crucifixion, with Christ's last words literally being "My God, my God why have you forsaken me?" Matthew 27:46 as God offering up his child as the sacrificial lamb for all his creation. That's a love I can't get my head around. That's a mystery I can't fathom.

And it illustrates to me on a whole other level the passion. My Easter was different this year, but it was profound.

The Booglet got a IV (no crying about the needle) and slept through the next hour while her mother held her. Our whole little family there in a room, huddled around this 30 pound beautiful creature that neither her mother or I dreamed could ever make us so happy. We left and drove home, exhaling finally and knowing the worst was over. Our little child was re-hydrated and Mommy and Daddy put her to bed. Everyone slept late the next morning, including Chester.

When I got home last night she was hopping around so the worst is over. She's starting to eat again and we went for a hike along the bay late yesterday afternoon. She's asking about Saturday's swim lessons and we're getting back to normal.

Taxman

If you drive a car, I’ll tax the street,
If you try to sit, I’ll tax your seat,
If you get too cold, I’ll tax the heat,
If you take a walk, I’ll tax your feet.

And you’re working for no one but me,
Taxman.

The Beatles

Oh well, at least I'm helping spread democracy...

It's Funny...and Scary

Spring in badosworld

The acre kingdom is bouncing back to life after a winter's slumber.


Wisteria. I planted this about two years ago. It's an exotic (not native to the Sunshine State) but I enjoy the flowers so much I can't resist.


Iris. These were planted by Calamity and I shortly after we built the house. They come up every year to remind us spring is here.


Indigo bunting, Passerina cyanea . It's the best shot I could get of this little guy. After a strong front, usually you'll see a number of neo-tropicals like this one, riding the weather to parts north. He reminds me that the hummingbirds are on their way too so I juiced up the feeders and am waiting.


Booglet, Boogleta maxima, enjoying the yard and suffering Daddy's camera.

On a more somber note, I have another trial coming up in two weeks and will not be able to do much with this site. I'll try to post what I can and certainly be back on the other side...for now, I hope everyone has their gardens planted and is enjoying the nice weather.

Sometimes You're The Window Shield, Sometimes You're The Bug
Booglet sick today, with long recovery estimated for the weekend. Told Zack I'd have to brave the video store to get some movies. So I wander around for a few minutes before seeing a lull in the checkout line.

"Hi. I need to get a few movies. I can't find them. I'd like a few."

Video Girl, looking amused, "What movies do you need?"

"A couple of Disney films. Beauty and the Beast (Belle is on her pull-ups) and, do you have Jungle Book?"

Video Girl. "We have Jungle Book II."

Blink. "They made a sequel?"

Video Girl, smiling, offering no information.

"What about Nemo?" I add hopefully. We went to see that on ice.

Video Girl, "Okay." Asks someone to get these two movies I'll be watching on the couch tomorrow if she's still too sick to do swim lessons (she is) or the big party.

Video Girl, arranging the 2 CD's, "What's your card number?"

I don't know, my wife rents movies... "Can I just buy these?"

Video Girl looking at the computer, "Can't sell you The Beauty and the Beast, we only have one copy. Do you have a card?"

I don't. I got ten plus cards on me--none of them a Video Store card. I bet Calamity Jane has one...

"Aren't you guys nationwide?"

"Yes!" Say Video Girl proudly.

"So, can't you find my wife's card number somewhere? Can I buy the other movie?"

Ignoring me, "Do you know the store?"

I'm lost in these transactions.

"Near the Walmart," I volunteer (of course--so is this store). "On 98..." I add hopefully. "Listen, my daughter is sick and needs movies tomorrow while her 30 pound body works out a stomach virus."

She looks at me. I'm wearing a tie because I had a hearing today. Now I realize I'm way out of place.

"Let me call." She picks up the phone.

Oh please, let all the computers hook up. I wait.

Girl Video Store operator, "Okay."

"That's it?"

"Yep, these are good for one week. Hope your daughter gets better."

"Thanks."

Why My Head Hurts

"Let me just say something about leaks in Washington. There are too many leaks of classified information in Washington. There's leaks at the executive branch; there's leaks in the legislative branch. There's just too many leaks. And if there is a leak out of my administration, I want to know who it is. And if the person has violated law, the person will be taken care of."
President George W. Bush, September 30, 2003

Yoga Anyone?



Look at the language circled in red--years of practice huh?



Or maybe just a few beers...

Mad props to Calamity Jane for sending me these pictures. Thanks honey.

Caption This...

Driving With Daddy

Tunes we listened to on the way to school today.

Down on the Corner--Creedence Clearwater Revival
Fortunate Son--Creedence Clearwater Revival

and of course the old standbys--Boogieman and Just Got Lucky.

Groovy baby...

Go Gators!

Books

Books in the stand next to my bed. Most read, and waiting for relocation to the study shelves. Some just waiting...

Glider Basics, Thomas L. Knauff
How to Start and Build a Law Practice, Jay Foonberg
Hen's Teeth and Horses Toes, Jay Gould
Hugs for Dad, John William Smith
I Married a Communist, Phillip Roth
Straight from the Heart for Couples, Richard Exley
A Lay Minister's Guide to the Book of Common Prayer, Clifford W. Atkinson
The Gnostic Gospels, Elaine Pagels
Truman, David McCullough
Chronicles, Bob Dylan
Gliding Safety, Derek Piggott
Holy Blood, Holy Grail, Michael Baigent, Richard Leigh, and Henry Lincoln
[These, by the way, are the authors, and the book they wrote, who are suing Dan Brown for writing The DaVinci Code]
The First American, the Life and Times of Benjamin Franklin, H.W. Brands
Mostly Harmless, Douglas Adams
Seek My Face, John Updike
Behind the Oval Office, Dick Morris
The Divine Comedy, Dante
Harper Study Bible, Revised Standard Version
The Cosmic Landscape, String Theory and the Illusion of Intelligent Design, Leonard Susskind
1776, David McCullough

Plus the last 4 months' of National Geographic and this month's Astronomy magazine...

Of Fighting, Writing, and Wondering Where We're Heading

Long day of fun and chores with the little one. Now watching an excellent heavyweight fight at Bobalouie's. Lamond Brewster v. Serge Lahovitch. Lahovitch wins after twelve rounds in a unanimous decision. And Bobalouie den time assures some writing time.

Picked up the camper today, fresh from sprucing up and retuning. We got this because I took Bubba to pick it up basically. It was in pretty bad shape when I retrieved it; I had to fix a flat just to haul it off. But, after some repairs, I gotta say, it looks ready to go.

Here's the closet picture I could find--not ours. Ours still could use some cleaning on the outside but everything functions now like when it was rolled off the assembly line...

I'm lookin' to pile into this after a long day of killin' trout. I want to hear the waves crashing on the Gulf while feeling the salty breeze. The Booglet just likes playing house in it. This will be her first camping trip. To think her mother and I used to canoe out with all our food and water, and not see anyone but shrimpers for days so long ago. More people, less room to stretch out. When I was a kid, I used to wonder when I heard there would be six billion peopple in the world (now 6.5-6.5 depending on who you believe):

Where will they put all of them?

Now I know.

Everywhere.

By the way, anyone want to interpret this graph?



Are they saying world population growth is going to suddenly start declining? I haven't seen anything in my lifetime to support this. Is someone at the
U.S. Census Bureau not telling us something?

Still I'm excited. I forget sometimes she's only two. Oh Little One, I hope one day to show you so much--wait till you see the sharks and seaturtles on the grass flats, when we watch the horseshoe crabs, Limulus polyphemus, burrowing into the sand, when we eat the fishes Daddy caught that day. It's all coming soon and it's just the beginning.

I had to go to a mall today. Oh man, nothing depresses me more than going to the mall. People spending money they don't have for things they don't need. And everywhere the lure of sex. Young models' pictures pushing, what? Cellphones? Bath oils? Jeans? I can hardly tell anymore.

Oh no! I've become that dude...I'm working on crochety.

But seriously, Got gas today (for Bubba and the shuttle) $2.69 per gallon. Uh, how are the people still driving these BUSH/CHENEY 2004 SUV's paying for their gas? Oh wait, I forgot.

The tax cuts.

Silly Daddy.