Grown Ups
Ben Stein had an article in the New York Times a few days ago about clothes. Sort of. He was bemoaning the decline in dress standards that has crept into all aspects of life these days. Remember when Dad sat down to dinner in his suit? I think that just happened on TV. Anyway, he made the statement that wearing a suit makes you feel like a grown up. Today I'm wearing a suit. Makes me think about grups.*

1) You know you're a grup when you say "get down before you fall."

2) Grups are always talking about the S&P 500 and insurance but can rarely tell you when the moon will rise or whether it's waxing or waning.

3) You know you're a grup when you go out with your family and you're going to get the check. You are.

4) Grups go to funerals. They wear dark cothes.

5) Grups are always too busy to play, even the grups who aren't busy.

6) Grups buy their own shaving cream, toilet paper, antacids and Prozac.

7) Grups rarely sing. They can't dance anymore either.

8) You know you're a grup when you are worried about what you eat and how much you make.

9) Grups are always worried about making a mess.

10) Grups are always trying to figure out the endgame. They've forgotten the fun is the game.

Also, when a grup asks you what you do, he or she isn't asking about for fun. They want to know what your job is so they can make assumptions about things like your education, societal status and income. They don't really care about what you like to do. Try this sometime at a cocktail party:

GRUP: "So, what do you do?"

jemison: "Oh I like to view the Cassini division on Saturn, fish and play guitar. How 'bout you?"

GRUP:...... [blinking]......... "No, what's your job?"

So today I'm wearing a suit and looking for all the world like a grup. But I'm a grup insurgent.

*Grups; noun,--grown ups. Star Trek, original series, episode 12, "Miri"